Thinking Out Loud
by Sqully
Summary: TATE friendship. He helps her deal with the aftermath of Ari. SHE DOESN'T DIE! muahahaha...R&R please
1. 1Personal

**Thinking Out Loud**

**Chapter One: Personal**

"I thought I'd die before I heard you say that." That got a chuckle out of him _and_ Gibbs. She winces visibly, because the bullet is still stuck in the vest, and hitting her abdomen. Kate begins to lean forward in pain right as a whoosh of air passes over her head and Tony took her down with him to the hard rooftop. Her body stills underneath his strong one as silence ensues. Kate's breathing becomes choppy as does Tony's. Neither moves, waiting, for what their not sure. Another gun shot? Gibbs's body joining theirs? But there's just nothing. Tony bites his lip and slowly eases his head up to look around. His boss is standing completely rigid, gun up, eyes probing the area in which the bullet intented for Kate came from. It was Ari, it had to be.

"We didn't even look for him." Tony muttered under his breath, suddenly angry with the fact that Kate had almost been shot by that bastard. He looks down at her to see Kate's eyes watching Gibbs.

"What is he going to do?" She whispered, meeting his eyes. Tony swallowed.

"I don't know."

"Come and get me." Ari smiled without any emotion and watched. Gibbs eyes were almost on top of him, but from this distance he couldn't see him. He carefully extracted his rifle from the building's edge, and disappeared.

"He could be anywhere by now." McGee added as Tony crosses his arms over his chest. He's barely listening to his and Gibbs' conversation, being worried about Kate. The Caitlyn he knows is not this quiet, the Caitlyn he knows would not be sitting at her desk staring into space while there's talk about how Ari is probably out of the country by now. She would be arguing along with McGee. He sighs as Kate suddenly meets his eyes. There's a fear there that shouldn't be. 'You wanna talk?' He mouths to her, and she smiles softly and nods.

"Uh, boss, we're gonna go get some coffee." Gibbs tilts his head in consent.

"Great, I would love so-"

"Not you Probie, sorry." Tim's mouth drops open but he shuts up from the glare he's thrown. Kate and Tony dissapear into the elevator and Jethro returns to his desk.  
"Are you still resigning from NCIS?" Both men look over to Fornell who raises his eyebrows in question.

"Hell no."

* * *

It's a clear night, not too hot, not too cold. A chilly breezes comes out of no where, reaching the roof and its occupants. The slight wind pushes her dark hair out of her pale face and a shiver crawls up her spine. He licks his lips, and glances down to her. The silence, which has been going on for about fifteen minutes, is starting to unnerve Tony. This was not his idea of talking it out. So he clears his throat to catch her attention.

"I don't know whats gotten into me." She finally admits, though it confuses Tony.

"How do you mean?" Kate's teeth close against the inside of her cheek, trying despertaly to ignore the way her emotions are attempting to grab at her from every direction.

"We come close to death every day, it's part of job…so what makes this so different?" Her soft voice barely reaches him, but he understands.

"Well, usually it's not so personal, and usually it's not Ari…who might I add abducted you as well." Kate squeezed her eyes shut at the memory.

"I was so scared that he was gonna kill you, I would've done anything he asked. And today, today did not help at all." The last part hits hard, but Tony gets past the shock, and moves in front of her to gently lift her chin up. Her misty eyes avoid his.

"Kate, look at me." Eyelids flicker, but the beautiful eyes he's come to rely on finally meet his. But, for the first time in a long time, Anthony DiNozzo is at lost for words. There's nothing you can say to erase the trepidation resting in her eyes. So he does the only thing he can do, hold her. Kate does not fight him, but welcomes the rare intimacy between them. Hands clasp tightly together against his back; holding on for dear life. Tony engulfs her, causing a feeling of safety to stir inside her that hasn't been there in a long time. He suddenly cracks a smile, and speaks into her soft hair.

"Should we go to your apartment or should I take you to dinner first?"

**A/N:** Okay, a lot of factors mix in with my pissyness. First, the show itself, second, all the fanfiction stories of her death. SHE DIDN'T NECCESSAIRLY DIE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. There's a big portion of our brain we don't use. Goddammit, some of you people really piss me off. Okay I'm done ranting, if you want me to continue writing their new found closeness/friendship review. Thanks much!


	2. 2Her Apartment

**Thinking Out Loud**

**Chapter Two: Her Apartment**

* * *

"'Sleepless in Seattle'. '_Sleepless in Seattle'_? You have_ got_ to be kidding me?" Kate Todd just snickers evilly as Tony DiNozzo stares in disbelief.

"Hey, you told me to pick a mov-"

"But I never said a chick flick!"

"_But_, you failed to specify which genre, sorry." Giving up, or rather giving in, Tony leans back against her couch, residing in her living room. They had originally planned the movie night at his apartment, but do to his constantly quarreling neightbors, Kate's place won. Tony laced his fingers behind his head as she fast forwarded through the previews. To him there was always too many commericals before movies. Isn't that what TV shows are for? Averting his gaze from the tube, he instead watches his collegue's movements. She seems calmer tonight, sitting cross legged beside him, which is a good sign. Gibbs gave her a couple days off; in which Tony has no idea how she occupied her self. Maybe called siblings? Parents? Hopefully something that helped her cope.

"Tony? You still with me?" Grinning, he realizes the movie is starting.

"As much as I'll ever be."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Oh…my…god…I'm sorry, but I do not like this movie at all. Maybe the spider part, that was somewhat amusing, but otherwise, gag. I can tell Kate likes it, she was totally into it this whole time.

"Is it almost over?" I whisper, leaning in a little. My answer is a shush and an elbow in the ribs. I'll take _that_ as a no. I wish I could visit the Eiffle Tower, or whatever it is. It could be interesting, probably more interesting than this fuc-

"Hey! What's with the elbow?" In an effort to get my point across, I rub my side in mock hurt. What, is she a mind reader now? Jeez…of course she just smirks, pretending to still be _fully_ emerged in the poor excuse for a movie. Sighing, I stretch both arms along the back of the couch, my left one now behind her. That might not be the best idea, but she doesn't seem to mind. _Oh_, now their hugging? Come on! I would be kicking that boy's ass for flying across the country by him self… this movie is going to corrupt my mind if I watch any more.

"I'm gonna use the restroom." She nods mutely, so I leave. As I'm, you know, doing my buisness, I glance around her bathroom. Her shower curtain is a two parter, a cloth one and a plastic one that sits in the tub. She has a theme type thing going on, I believe it is purple, or rather some purple flower. I'm not sure what it is. I'll ask her. Finished, I walk out, the sounds of the rushing water following me down the short hallway. It's over and she's wiping away a tear. A TEAR? Kate Todd is crying? Has the sky fallen? Or is it just me? What could've happened in the five or so minutes when I was peeing that would actually make her cry? Women… Not really knowing what to do, I just kinda hang back while she blows her nose. Ah, I've never been so glad to see credits rolling down the tube. Kate, back to normal I guess, turns her body towards me, seeing the look on my face, glares.

"It was sweet!" She exclaims. When all I do is nod, not really believing her of course, she just shakes her head while mumbling to herself. Stretching, I observe that the living room is now safe to return to, and proceed back to the couch…with caution. Women…

-

Men…Tony is such a guy. _'A hot guy!' _My conscience reminds me. Now I can't help but look over my shoulder to seem him stretching his arms behind his head. Look at those muscles…okay bad train of thought there. Shaking my head and sighing tiredly, I also return from taking the DVD out, and sit next to him. Snatching up the remote, I flip through channels. Tony's silent beside me, I wonder what he's thinking about. It's way too quiet in here, and I'm not finding any thing on TV to watch. But then he clears his throat.

"So, how was your mini-vacation?"

"Alright, I guess."

"That's good." Okay, he's confusing me now. What's with this sudden bout of niceness. We're Tony and Kate, we're not supposed to be _nice_ to each other. We're the quarreling siblings…right? Sometimes I doubt that. There's something there, it's just difficult to pinpoint. And, I can't get involved with _Tony_. I've spent a good portion of my life avoiding guys like Tony. _'You mean the hot and incredibly sexy guys?' _Sighing, I finally glance over at him to meet two concern filled eyes staring back at me.

"You alright?" Swallowing, I look down. I should of known he'd be able to read my face. That's his job.

"Just thinking…"

"Care to share?" Yeah, yeah I think I will.

"Well, these past few days have made me reevaluate my life. I could not be sitting here with you right now…and," I have to pause and take a deep breath, and my voice comes out tiny, "and that scares me." These past couple of days, I felt alone. And I wanted to call him, I really did, but I couldn't.

"You know why it scares you?" Blinking, I turn and look up into those eyes that are narrowed slightly in concentration.

"Because you're human." He whispers. And for the first time in my life, I allow myself to accept that. Sniffing lightly, I scoot closer, and my eyes close involunarily as his strong arms wrap around me like a warm blanket. My body fits perfectly with him and we both lean back into the couch. The tangable safety that I feel is wonderful and new. Please don't let me wake up from this dream; where I'm allowed to be myself.

"Bill Pullman is so much cuter than Tom Hanks." I murmer into his chest.

"What was that?" I just smile and whisper back.

"Just thinking out loud."

EL FIN

(Okay, I understand that she could really be dead, but that doesn't mean that all stories from now on have to have her dead in them! That's just cruel…. Hope you enjoyed, I might have a sequel, I don't know what it would be, but hey I might get bored. Please review!)


End file.
